A stranger farted on my head. I wish I was lying or telling a fish tail but sadly it is true. I was in Publix kneeling down to look at cough drops when I heard a whooshing noise. I rolled my eyes right, nothing. I rolled my eyes left, huge ass! Suddenly the smell hit me. My eyes teared up and I let out an involuntary gasp/chocking sound. The large ass scurried off and I was left on the floor wallowing in a stranger’s ass emission. As I teetered there, unable to escape the stench I pondered how this could have happened. It was almost like it was done purposely… Was she checking to see if I had a cold? Really I was squatting infront of sore throat remedies and last I knew that does NOT impede smelling. Did she sidle up to me expecting to lay a stinky on me or did it somehow escape?

On a side note.. Nothing like calling the doctor to make an appointment for someone who is seriously sick, only to be told that the soonest appointment is WEDNESDAY - god how I HATE our HMO