Middle School Woes, Bullies and Birth Control?
I remember middle school as the most turbulent chunk of my public schooling. Who ever came up with the idea to take all the kids wobbling on the cusp of hormonal overload and caging them up on the same campus, must truly have a sadistic streak. 6-8 grade is a time where you are too cool for baby stuff and not old enough to do a blessed thing There is nothing to do but rail against all authority and dominate those weaker then you. I have been preparing myself to help my children deal with this eventuality. I have not, however, prepared myself to deal with my children’s middle school offering hormonal birth control without specific parental consent.
King Middle School in Portland, Maine offers a free student clinic where middle schoolers can receive basic health care. Parents sign a consent form allowing the students to receive services but the form does not clearly define what services are available to the students. The ambiguity of the form is now an issue as the school board approved a measure that makes hormonal birth control available to the middle school students through the health clinic without specific consent from parents.
What parent would want to deny their child care for basic ailments, especially if they are among the millions of Americans who live without health insurance? None that I know and so many will sign the consent form without even realizing that it allows the school to prescribe and provide hormonal birth control in the form of pills and patches to their 11-13 year old daughters.
I have no issue with the schools educating children about safe sex, passing out condoms, offering counseling, and I think it would be fantastic if the clinic offered gynecological exams as a standard service. I do take issue with the clinic offering hormonal birth control not only to children at such a young age but to children who’s parents do not have to be informed that their child is obtaining a prescription for drugs that may cause health problems.
Hormonal birth control and it’s use has been tied to breast cancer, cervical cancer, liver tumors, diabetes, blood clots, mood disorders, weight issues and more. Is it responsible and reasonable to assume that all parents would allow their children to take such medication? Shouldn’t this service require a separate consent form which discusses exactly what pills and patches are being offered and the associated risks?
At 11 I had zero concept of family health history. I have an inherited clotting disorder, not something that they routinely test for unless and until you suffer from a blood clot or present with pregnancy complications. At 11 I could have waltzed into this center, received a BASIC check up and a script to begin hormonal birth control. I could die from that. My girls could die from that. They very well may have my clotting disorder. There is no reason for me to get them tested now, it should not affect them. I will get them tested should they ever be interested in birth control pills… oh but wait! Under Portland Maine’s new clinic policy, I wouldn’t even KNOW.
Imagine finding their lifeless body and rushing off to the hospital
“Ma’am, does your child take any medications?”
“Why no, nothing!!”
(actually she does, I just don’t know it. Oh, and it can cause life threatening complications)
What are your thoughts on this issue. To me, it just smacks of irresponsibility.
October 18th, 2007 at 9:39 am
That is completely outrageous! You have a very good point about giving prescriptions without your knowledge. It is extremely irresponsible and I forsee lawsuits following. At that age, condoms are going to be blown up as balloons (I have two teenagers and an 11 year old) and gyno check ups are unneccesary unless my child is sexually active or over 16. If that child is sexually active, the parents need to be contacted so they can continue the education at home..where it should be anyway.
I believe that, beyond fundamental sex education in health class, that the school needs to keep their two cents out of my child’s sexual health. I have a pediatrician for that…a damn good one too. Even if I didn’t have health care for my children, there are plenty of sources that would provide sexual health services. I do realize some children do not have responsible parents to talk to about sex and resources at school can be useful…counseling resources.
It’s insane. My child can’t pray in school but can damn sure get help and encouragement screwing the boys in the locker room. Seems there is a coorelation.
October 18th, 2007 at 12:13 pm
I have to agree with the previous commenter. This is just crazy and asking for trouble. I have 4 boys, but if I had a daughter, I hope we would have the kind of open relationship where she was comfortable in caming to me about such matters.
By the way, have been lurking for a bit and decided to come out of lurkdom
October 18th, 2007 at 12:49 pm
You can blame this latest development - along with so many others that are a giant pain in my ass - on HIPAA. Because of medical privacy rules, some states/medical insurance companies have put the age at which parents can’t know about their child’s medical decisions/records at between ages 12-14. That used to cause me a TON of trouble when I was working in the health insurance industry…
“You mean my child can run off and have an abortion, and I can’t know about it, but I have to pay for it?!?!?”
“Yes”
“That’s ridiculous!!”
“Write to your congressperson. I don’t make the rules.”
How much this is enforced, I don’t know, but it’s out there. Ew.
October 18th, 2007 at 2:21 pm
To offer an alternative perspective - I suffer from a genetic hormonal imbalance which to keep things short, is the period from hell. The worst part is the debilitating morning sickness (for several days with each and every period). My family were, to a degree, sympathetic, as was my wonderful doctor. We tried every single treatment out there (conventional and experimental) - in every possible permutation. (Except, of course, hormonal therapy, which my doctor held out for years as the option most likely to be successful, because that comes in the form of birth control or HRT, neither of which my mother was prepared to give to her twelve year old). Nothing worked. From the age of nine until the age of eighteen, I suffered one week out of every three - missed I don’t know how many days of school because I needed a bathroom for one reason or another every five minutes. At eighteen I said enough and took myself off to the doctor for some ‘hormonal therapy’. Six years later (still on ‘therapy’), I no longer vomit or bleed in public. Middle school (and high school) would have been a lot less hellish if I’d had access to birth control from the age of twelve.
Oh, and I’m not sexually active.
Yes, you heard that correctly. The fact that I take birth control doesn’t encourage me (or, for that matter, my sisters) to engage in reckless sexual activity. Your child’s best defense against early sexual activity and unwanted pregnancy is an open relationship with their parents (including a discussion about your family history, if relevant), and plenty of frank (secular) education about sex - starting early, so that there’s no mystery about it. The year I entered fourth grade, our school piloted early sex ed from fourth grade onward. Ours was the first class to get sex ed before seventh grade. . .and the first in the 100 year history of the school to have no one pregnant before graduation eight years later. Subsequent classes have repeated the feat. Coincidence? I think not.
October 18th, 2007 at 2:45 pm
Alison, I have no objections what so ever to kids have sex education and condoms made available. I dont believe either makes a child sexually active. I have problems with a stranger (to me) giving my child prescription medications which have been proven to cause serious and life threatening side effects. As a parent, it is my duty to protect and guide my children. This includes making a educated choice about them using prescription birth control methods.
I’m glad that synthetic hormones have made your life better but as I explained in my post that is not the case for everyone and I would venture to say that your situation is rare.
October 18th, 2007 at 3:32 pm
I think it is so strange and sad the way that young girls are becoming sexually active earlier and earlier. I am not throwing stones, I was pretty young when I lost my virginity, but still…
October 18th, 2007 at 3:44 pm
joy, i dont know how many really are in the article it states
“Five of the 134 students who visited King’s health center during the 2006-07 school year reported having sexual intercourse”
that seems to be on par with what I remember of middle school
i think that as a society we ask our kids these questions sooner (realizing that sexuality is a topic at nearly any age vs the old dont ask dont tell policies that used to dominate). I think that more people are sexually active before marriage but I honestly dont think there is a massive spike in middle or even elementary age students having sex.
Shockingly, a guy I dated in high school lost his virginity at age 9
October 18th, 2007 at 5:24 pm
I SO AGREE!! Here in Wisconsin the state has a medical assistance program that does this. I was a ‘welfare worker’ back in the day… 2003 and I refused to have these girls as clients because I did not want the responsibilty of having parents calling me chewing me a new rearend. How dare the state think that they know what is best for my child. To me it just slaps me in the face with the fact that the government is TO BIG for the country. The people are no longer running the show, politicians with agendas and power are. We need to vote for canidates with broad ideas, not vote for a canidate because of ONE issue they may see as the BIG one. I quit my job because they were going to force me to handle these cases… My moral conviction ment nothing. Have you heard about the woman who is being charged with disorderly conduct for swearing at her toilet in her own home? She was over heard by a neighbor, an off duty cop, and he turned her in for it. WICKED AINT IT!!
October 18th, 2007 at 5:30 pm
btw - I just read Allisons comment. I to suffered with horrid periods, mine started at 11 and were 7-9 days long and I would use 8-10 pads or more per day. I went on birth control becuase my parents knew that I was not nor would be sexually active until I was much older. BUT, doing so at such a young age has now completly messed up my pituitary (spelling?) gland. I have a weight issue, my thyroid is screwed up and I have had SEVERAL misscariages. My Dr. believes it was because of the hormones that my body was not ready for. I also have a problem getting pregers because if it. I would NEVER allow my daughter to do it. Not for the lack of trust on her part, but for the concequences later.
October 18th, 2007 at 10:49 pm
Hi Fidget!
I read your opinion and I want to say thanks for introducing a perspective on the issue that is gets lost in the debate over morality. It is something to think about, and I appreciate what you have said - it will be incorporated into my own thoughts about this.
My son is in this school district and could have attended King. He doesn’t, and his current school does not have an on-site clinic, so this is not an issue. However, I know many of his former elementary school classmates that do attend King. My thoughts on this are very personalized in that regard.
There is no absolute right or wrong here, I think. My son’s mother has, through her work, first-hand experience with sexually active middle schoolers and pregnant middle schoolers.
My instinct is that, even with the issue you raise, providing this option is on the whole a good thing.
But I do appreciate, again, the viewpoint that you bring up - and I will be considering it.
October 22nd, 2007 at 2:00 am
2 problems: hormones in milk causing early puberty and of course giving a prescription without a physical exam.
Pretty daarn stupid.
October 23rd, 2007 at 6:29 pm
I read this too and had similar thoughts — but you know what, I didn’t think about how not knowing about medications being taken would affect medical care in an emergency. That could be really dangerous.
October 24th, 2007 at 10:22 am
I just stumbled upon your site, and am FASCINATED with this post. I, too have a genetic clotting disorder—I’m curious to know more…..Mine is treated w/ vitamin b (complex) and folic acid. I do not need blood thinners. I’ve never met anyone else w/ this issue, and wonder if it’s the same as mine!
BTW, I have mixed feelings about birth control being readily available to youngsters. They are too young to make informed decisions about ANYTHING, including having sex, so protection is important, but so are the other issues regarding future health and medication issues. Interesting post, to say the least. I have boys, so, although I still have a responsibility of discussing birth control, it isn’t ingested for males. It gives parents alot to think about!
October 24th, 2007 at 10:22 am
This discussion has come up on many blogs and on IVillage.
I am totally against birth control in the schools. I firmly believe this is something that should be talked about at home, openly and honestly. The school and the government have no place in this discussion. I would hope that as a parent, I have the kind of relationship with my children where they can come to me and discuss birth control.
Thing 1 is 12 and we have already had the talk with him. DH and I both told him how important it was for him to wait until he finds the right person. We also told him that when he was ready to make that step we wanted him to be protected. We did the whole shooting match, pregnancy to AIDS.
This is our discussion to have with our children and if need be, it is our place to make sure they are protected. Not the schools. Not the government
October 24th, 2007 at 1:56 pm
“I do take issue with the clinic offering hormonal birth control not only to children at such a young age but to children who’s parents do not have to be informed that their child is obtaining a prescription for drugs that may cause health problems.”
You completely nailed it in one sentence. Rock on for addressing it.
October 24th, 2007 at 6:35 pm
I, too, came across your site from another one…as a 7th grade teacher, when I saw the words middle school, I had to keep reading. As some of your other readers pointed out, those who suffer from genetic hormonal imbalances can benefit from hormonal birth control, but not the variety found in a school clinic. I would like to know what purpose the district is trying achieve from distributing birth control at school. In addition, birth control, while, when used correctly, is more effective than a condom, offers no protection against sexually transmitted diseases. Unfortunately, most adolescents aren’t cognitively developed enough to distinguish between the two, especially when peer pressure is thrown into the mix. And, this is where the school district may find itself in hot water.
October 25th, 2007 at 6:45 am
Shelly and FYDY:
Bleeding Disorder, you say? Finally diagnosed with Lupus Anticoagulant on Monday — after 2 years of telling doctors that something was wrong. My dad had his first serious clot (DLT) at exactly MY AGE. No treatment yet, so I’m wondering if I have to clot before I take something. Blargh! Something else is going on that’s not yet diagnosed, so wish me luck.
Dooley
p.s. my eldest boy is in middle school, seemingly uninterested in dating, but who knows? my best friends lost their virginities at 11, 12 and 13 — i was a little naive and was not an “early adopter.”
October 25th, 2007 at 7:13 am
I started taking the pill at 14 for periods like those discussed above. My parents were completely open about sex and left it up to me to decide when I was “ready.” Believe me, I was on the pills for YEARS and YEARS before I became sexually active. Getting my life back from the hell of my period was wonderful.
That said, I think this whole idea is outrageous. HIPPA be damned–parents of a Middle Schooler should know what the kid is given!! Until age 18 that should be the norm. I know, I live on Fantasy Island!
FYI–if you want to read more about the horrors of Middle School, check out my blog at http://hopewellmomschoolreborn.blogspot.com/