Her bad fashion

There I was, hurtling down a toll road in the inky black of early winter night obsessing about my shoes. My toes clenched and curled and though they could hide from the certain embarrassment that accompanies wearing bold brown shoes with black pinstriped pants.

She’ll understand right? She’s got kids, she HAS to understand. I mean, what mom hasn’t lost a pair or two of shoes to the Lilliputians of her house? I think she won’t notice.. or maybe she’ll be too polite to stare (she is Canadian after all) but inside her head be flabbergasted about my brown shoes and black pants.

I bet she won’t hear a thing I say and probably won’t be able to hold a conversation with me either because all she’s be thinking is “brown shoes black pants brown shoes black pants brown shoes black pants.” And then I’ll over talk to compensates for my nerves and her lack of coherency due to being hypnotized by my poor fashion sense. This gal may go back to Canada practically catatonic because I couldn’t find my damn black shoes!

So I stopped and picked up some wine. Feeling a bit peckish, I also grabbed hummus and some dipper thingies. When I reentered the car, I saw them sitting there.. my new red shoes.

I briefly wondered if red shoes, black pants, and purple sweater could possibly be less fashion offensive. It was only a brief thought though, because truth be told, I am terrified of these red shoes.

I think they will complete the ensemble I am wearing to a wedding this weekend but then again everyone might turn to me, raise their fingers in mocking glee and ask which elf I stole them off of.

Thankfully, Her Bad Mother, in true Canadian fashion, was far too polite to faint over my obvious fashion faux paux. Not a single titter or case of the vapors over what had grown in my mind to be EPIC.

She let me smooshie on her ridiculously cute kids and Bo had himself a time talking to Jasper. I’m pretty sure Bo was asking Jasper how he managed to grow that rockin’ pomp of blond hair.