I just realized that today is my due date. Now if I was this big FOUR days before I had Bo (5 weeks ago) then imagine how massive I’d be today.

Thankfully, though, instead of cutting the side of my house open and schlepping me downtown on a flat bed trailer, I have a beautiful

although colicky

5 week old baby boy

On may 25th at 5:12 pm after 5 hours and 4 minutes of labor Boden Troy was born weighing 7lbs 6oz at exactly 35 weeks on the dot.

Thank goodness for my friend Melody! On Sunday I started having contractions and after 2 hours I decided to take them seriously. I checked myself; my water bag was bulging and it felt like I was dilated to 4 or 5 (I don’t think I can even express exactly how helpful it was the find a diagram showing cervical dilation in one of my pregnancy books. Had I not had that as a reference guide, I most likely would have ignored this whole episode until it was too late). We tried calling all of our backup and every.single.family member was at WORK!! Melody came to our rescue though and rushed over to look after our 3 kiddles.

On the car ride over to the hospital DH and I kept thinking that they were just going to send me home. My contractions were demanding my attention but I had been through several similar bouts over the preceding few weeks so I was expecting them to peter out any moment. As we got closer to the hospital I started getting a little irrational, yelling at all the people who seemed to be in our path meandering around town foolishly below the speed limit.

Inside the L&D triage waiting room I was struck with a powerful contraction. I had my hand wrapped around the sign in pen and was stabbing at the paper trying to fill it out as quickly as possible. I must have looked rather impressive because we were taken back immediately, ahead of several other people who were patiently waiting.

Once in a triage room, I was checked and told they were keeping me. I was indeed dilated to a stretchy 5 with bulging waters and now completely effaced. We started calling around to get the word out- it’s baby time! A pencil pusher came in to get all my insurance info and profusely apologized as I grunted my way through the initialing and signing process that felt like it was 500 pages long. The poor guy looked flat out terrified that I was going to blow right then and there. One of the nurses came in and surprisingly got my IV started on the first try. At this point there were three nurses in the room getting ready to move me and they all cheered when I told them I wouldn’t be needing an epidural.

Within 25 minutes of checking in, I was up in a delivery room and had progressed to 6. A few contractions later I felt the baby perform some acrobatic maneuver and the contractions were no longer pulsating in my back but rather in my pelvis- little man swung himself around into proper position and I could feel him moving down with each contraction. Suddenly my bag of water broke, the pain became intense. A nurse checked me and I was at 8. Another contraction rolled in while she was checking me and I hollered that I needed to push. She quickly confirmed that I had gone from 8 to complete in the span of one contraction!

The room went nuts. I was yelling that I needed to push and everyone was yelling back “Blow, don’t push, blow!” I fought hard to try and blow but my body said NO WAY and started pushing. As the next contraction waved over me I bared down and gave birth.

That moment was a huge triumph. I had a completely unmedicated and unaugment labor- exactly what I had hoped for. And as a nice cherry on top, my first baby that was not sunny side up!

Sunday I turned 35 weeks and had a little chat with the belly boy. It went something like this:

Me: So um, from what I hear you are BIG and while I loves me a baby with some meat on his bones, if you get too much they are going to want to rip you out of there

Baby: (kick kick)

Me: yeah, I’m not so down with that either.

Baby: (hiccuping)

Me: So let’s work on you coming before that amnio date MMMkay?

Baby: (spasms kicks and twists)

Belly: (Contracts)

Me: (Looks at clock) Hmm, well that’s a good start. Let’s turn that into something son.

5 hours and 4 minutes later at 35 weeks gestation Baby Boden (aka Bo) rocketed into the world weighing a whopping 7 lbs 6 oz and measuring 19 inches long.

My bedroom is painted. I repeat my bedroom is painted! Not only is my bedroom painted but The Hubster is working on the floor. I’m so giddy I feel like I’m going to faint!

Yesterday I had a false alarm, one that seemed real enough that I ran around between contractions stuffing the kids clothes into bags and redialing The Hubster cursing the universe for crappy reception during storms. After 2 hours it petered out and I felt like an idiot for putting everyone on alert.

My shot officially wore at at 3:30 today

*crickets*

Last time I went this far past (nurse’s car was stuck in sand), I was on the floor double over with contractions. Thus far…. *crickets*

Six years, one month, and some odd days ago, I had a very traumatic birthing experience, one where my 1st official words uttered as a mother were “Is she dead?” Mira had become what everyone thought was hopelessly wedged in my pelvis by her shoulders. She turned blue, then purple then black. A nurse leaped up on to me, ass in my face and began shoving downwards with all her might. My midwife pulled on her wee little head, other nurses wrenched my legs back and I bore down with all my might. The midwife began screaming for someone to get my doctor- they were ready to break my pelvis- when Mira came shooting out like some kind of cartoon projectile. The doctor walked through the door just in time to help pink her up and hear her first weak caterwauling. It.was.terrifying. and we were lucky, very very lucky. She suffered no expected ill effects of being stuck- permanent nerve damage is always a huge concern with shoulder dystocia.

Since then, my babies have been watched very closely for accelerated growth. No doctor wants to repeat that scenario and as enticing as repeating a double episiotomy is, I’ve wanted to avoid it too. Thus Tessa was booted from the womb at 36 weeks and 6 days. Her ultrasound placed her close to the 8lb mark and doctors decided that with the known discrepancies of late term ultrasound, it was time to act. Thankfully they did. Her birth healed me.

Levi was on size watch too when he decided to make his way into the world 1 day before his scheduled amnio, which is now required to evict a baby before 39 weeks. I have a feeling that overwhelming terror of that hollow needle on my part caused my water to break.

I would hope that those of you that know me personally and my long time readers realize that I do not take the process of pregnancy and birth lightly. I have experienced the highest heights of joy as well as the deepest sadness. I make what feels like never ending trips to various doctors so I can be carefully monitored. I read and research like crazy knowing that my doctors are just that- doctors- and not Gods or some kind of omnipotent beings. I listen to my body as it speaks volumes to me, aiding me in making the best decisions I can about what goes on with my treatments. I can tell you that over the course of 3 pregnancies, it’s made my high risk doctor pull more then a few fistfuls of hair out of his head. And right now? I’m listening to my body. It’s telling me that he IS big- whether fat or or long I’m not sure but judging by the pulling, the crushing pressure and my inability to waddle more then a few feet without searing pain shooting down my legs, he’s bigger then his brother was at this stage.

I’m hoping that this little person decides to make his own way into the world before I am cornered into signing a surgical consent form. But know, that if I feel that I need to sign that consent form, I will. It will suck and I will cry and I’ll probably be fairly hysterical about the whole matter but I never again want to utter the word “dead?” at the birth of one of my children nor do I want to end up that way myself which brings me to the topic of an early csection.

If the amnio says he’s ready and the ultrasound suspects he’s too large to pass safely, they will csection me early. This will not be a matter of convince nor a choice made lightly, it will be a calculated move to keep me alive. I take 2 shots a day who’s purpose is to thin my blood. Ideally it is stopped 48 hours prior to any procedure where bleeding is expected. 24 hours is often enough leeway but “often” isn’t good enough when the prospect of bleeding out is so very real. There is a medication that can act to reverse the effects of the blood thinners but it has it’s downside too- if the dosage given is too high the risk of a blood clot forming skyrockets and determining the dosage is no exact science. It’s a total crap shoot.

In speaking with my doctors, they also have a fear that one of these days I wont make it to the hospital in time. If I wind up in labor during rush hour, you very well might be hearing about my minivan baby. Now if he is too big and I’m all hopped up on blood thinners and it’s rush hour- we have a very serious, very BAD situation on our hands. I want to avoid that.

So in conclusion to this long and winding diatribe on why I am doing my best to keep myself and my son out of danger by possibly consenting to medical procedures I am none to thrilled with, I just want to say that I hope you realize that I am thinking with my brain and not entirely out of fear. Does fear play into it? Oh hell yes. I never want to relive the first birth experience but I will not let fear deter me from pursuing the birth that I want. I also won’t let my own stubbornness to achieve my goal of a natural as possible birth endanger the life of my son or myself.

He’s HUGE… 34 weeks and already 6lbs 13 oz. I have about 3 weeks to lure him out before they want to carve me up. HELP!!! *sobs*

I have an ultrasound scheduled. I am 34 weeks. The average 34 weeker is 17.72 inches and 4.73 pounds. Anyone wager a guess as to how big my boy is? I’ll update when I get home.

Jude Lachlan

Reed Alexander

Donovan Jude

Demetri Troy

Boden Cort

Emmett Reed

Jonas Kade

Donovan Reed

Brighton Reed

Jonas Kai

I’ve been pretty quiet around here because I’ve been feeling, um let’s just say a little uncomfortable and can’t manage to come up with a creative and entertaining way to bitch about it every day. Today I saw exactly why it feels like my spine is about to be pulled through my belly button:

this kid is totally hanging off the front of me.

~*~**~*~**~

This week has been, uh, we’ll say interesting. Tessa flushed a tube of tooth paste down the toilet which resulted in a 2 day long toilet project, much cursing, and mass confusion. Tom’s of Maine’s kids tooth paste comes in a metal tube which when 1/2 empty is somewhat flexible with ridged corners so when it is flushed, it gets wedged in the S bend but yields and bends away from any type of retrieval tool one might fashion. This led to language not suitable for print. It was 230 am before the tooth paste was finally dislodged. Tessa celebrated the next day by saturating a tile sponge in the dog water and flinging it all over my dinning room resulting in a puddle rivaling the size of Lake Erie. She also managed to nail my walls which looked like they’d been slimed Ghost Busters style.